Painted Horses

Last night he kissed me
Like he cared
He ran his hands
Along my skin
I felt a full cacophony
In storm
For being touched
By him again.

I went to bed alone
Intact, in guilt
Feeling it was almost sin
To hold out or give in.

This morning she heard
The good news
She ran first to share
With him,
Then to tell her sister,
Then to shower
And the value I don’t have
Settled in

I cannot unbuild
The house we built with time
I cannot diagnose
How it all begins
He doesn’t do anything now
Deserving of treachery
I am dependant. I am grateful.
I am trapped within,

Caught in the spin.