viewingcamelot

If You, LORD, were to keep account of guilty deeds,
Lord, who could stand?
But there is forgiveness with You,
So that You may be revered.
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
And I wait for His word.

Psalm 130:3-5, NASB

Forgiveness is better
Than vengeance
When justice allows.
Don’t hold us to the letter;
Forgive our sins,
Our forgotten vows

Lead us from our ambition
Into humility and service
Beyond what we could
To pursue Your mission.
We don’t deserve this,
But You are good,

And all is Yours,
Even wayward we.

“You live long enough
You love hard enough
It’ll break you.”
There’s no other way

You know it’s true
If you’ve ever loved past the pain
The part that feels the beauty
The part that commits truly

Has no guards to cover its tenderness
Ït cannot live behind a glass
Instead, smiling at vulnerability,
Blooming like a flower in the rain

One part invincibility,
Every other part that remains
Framed in aching flesh
Choosing to love, to feel death…

Because only those who love
Can feel what it means to die.
Only Love can
Sing the honest grief of the lost;

Only love is worth that cost.

How faithful You are
To we, the faithless.
Raining down provision,
Pausing in patience
At the grinding of ambition
Against Your places,

Your peoples and desires.

Allowing for all who might be saved,
Until the time the ark is closed
And the season of Promise begins.

We give birth into the current
Wherein we are born.
For one moment
We hold their heads
Above the waves
And all the eddies,
The burning, choking, treading
Against swirling, rushing
Inevitability

Is worth it.

How have I spent
The language
You’ve given me?
In fear, doubt, anguish,

And sometimes faith?

Help me to recognize when close
Isn’t close enough.
Strengthen my obedience.
Fix Your love

On foolish me.
Protect me from every enemy,
Seen and unseen.

Redeem every failure.

Will the table I’ve built,
Not so level, on four tall stilts,
Stand steady or slowly tilt

And will the life that’s spilt

Be redeemed
By The Great Redeemer?

I know He can, but not if He will.
Either way, I’m His.

I don’t want to be angry,
Nor to complain again.
We’re all mad here
In the realm of men:

Male and female alike.

I’m such a little me.
Everyone wishes on the first star
The brightest beacon
But who can see one so far,

So small and distant?

Being a Wife

Being a Mother

Is being an emulsifier.

Father, forgive me.

I still struggle when
Acid touches open flesh.
What were You seeing
When You loved to the death?

What were looking into or through?

I want to look like You.
In healing the ear,
In the silence, in forgiveness,
Through sweat and blood and fear

You never spoke death.

An answer finds my soul,
Why I waste words, heaps by hours,
And You did not:
You knew Your words had power;

Mine feel powerless.

Yet You say life and death
Are in the power of the tongue-
Help me believe! Help me sing life
And leave the gall of death

Unheralded, unlauded, unsung.

Dry up the bitterness in me.
Spring up a well that is sweet.