Dropping Stones, Heading Home

Father of Mercies,

My heart has been broken.
I don’t remember
What the pieces looked like
Intact and assembled.
When the one I once loved betrayed
Thrusting me into danger,
I leapt into the arms
Of surprised strangers
Whose footing wasn’t sure.
Down I spilled.
After falling to rest
All the graves I’ve tilled
Have yielded the crops
Of my empty bones,
And the absence of mourners
Shows a life wrung into alone:
Exposed, hidden, exposed, hidden-
Like a lighthouse before dawn.
Lacking special devotion;
Not unloved, but withdrawn

But I don’t want to be angry.
I don’t want to carry my grievances.
Help me drop my stones;
I’d taken leave of my senses.
You came to save, not judge
All that’s required is belief
I believe;
Heal my grief
That leads me to look down
Or feel something inexplicable
Like doubt in Your promises;
Disloyalty is despicable
To the Most Faithful One.
Help me believe through and through;
Help me inspire belief;
Let others see proof of You
In the undulating mess of me.

Because You love us.

You really, really love us
With special devotion.